Siblings and Kids on the Autism Spectrum

Happy Sunday Everyone
It is a beautiful sunny day and Cassie and I just returned from a nice walk with the dog. Cassie is doing really well jet lag wise and seems happy and relaxed. I want this time for her to be an enjoyable experience so she will want to come back; or better yet not want to leave. :- )

My friendship with Cassie is so important to me and I can’t imagine not having her in my life. Children who are on the Autism spectrum may have problems developing such friendships and my fondest hope is that one day my daughter who has Asperger's (a pervasive development disorder related to Autism) will find such a friend. In the interim she has developed a bit of a friendship with an older girl from high school but it is not the kind of friendship that will probably last. For one, her friend will be graduating this June and she will be on her way to independence while my daughter will be in the school system for a few more years yet.

For my daughter the relationship she has with her younger brother is very important to her. There is a five-year difference but they seem to really enjoy each other’s company and do a lot of things together. I think she would be a very lonely child without her little brother. For kids on the spectrum siblings play a huge part in their social development and sometimes the younger child will develop a protective role and look out for their elder sibling. My son for instance will stick up for his sister if he feels like she is being taken advantage of.

All the best

Monicka

Love and Goal Setting

When goal setting with your kids, it is a good idea to encourage them to set goals in different parts of their lives. A sports-mad child might get excited about goal setting for sport, and it is a nice idea to ask him to think about setting other goals as well, in different areas of his life.

He can use goal setting to succeed and enjoy himself at school, and also in his family life.

Siblings often fight or argue - which is natural, after all they didn't pick their brothers and sisters and while for the most part siblings have loving relationships, sometimes the sparks can fly!

If you find this happens at your home, an idea for school-age kids is to ask them to make it a goal to behave nicely with their siblings. You can use a chore wheel (click on the link and scroll down to find the Chore Wheel Craft!) for consequences if there are any arguments, but more importantly make sure you praise and reward them when they manage to behave harmoniously for longer than usual! Maybe a treat or outing.

Another idea is to encourage siblings to have a joint goal of some kind if they have an interest in common - perhaps a goal to do with a family pet or shared hobby.

There are so many things you can use goal setting for with your family and your children, let's remember that as well as just "achievement" in the traditional sense of the world, we can use goal setting to achieve a more harmonious and loving family!

Happy parenting,

Cassie