Newsletters

Hello All,

It has been awhile since I have blogged so I figured it was about time, so here goes...

Wow! Can you believe it is almost the middle of March and of course you know what that means. Yep, time for the next newsletter. I decided to clean up my readers list and give anyone a chance that didn't really want the newsletter in the first place, to opt out before I send out the next campaign. According to Mail Chimp, (the nice people who send my letter out for me) mail lists get stale very quickly. Some people even forget they signed up in the first place. So please if you really don't want it, don't send it to SPAM because it then becomes an abuse complaint and I am sent a compliance letter from Mail Chimp. So if you don't want it you know what to do, just click on the unsubscribe button and I will take you off the list. But on to other matters.

Spring is in the air, and maybe even thoughts of love for your tween or teen. The March issue is about kids crushes and what you as a parent can do to help your child if they develop a crush on that certain someone. We have all been there, but for your child this can be a very traumatic time and it is crucial that you do not treat the crush as a trivial matter, but rather offer lots of love and support - especially if the crush isn't reciprocated :( I think you will find the article very informative.



Anyway hope you have a great weekend!!

Happy Parenting,

Monicka

Moving Forward

It has been a little over a month now since my wonderful friend Cassie passed and I miss her terribly. Grief is a journey, but one you shouldn't travel alone. If you are experiencing a loss it is imperative that you have support from family and friends and perhaps even seek professional help. I have been seeing a grief counselor and it has helped me to deal with the myriad of emotions that are part and parcel of the grieving process. She told me it is very common to feel guilt for not having done enough when that person was alive, and of course if your loved one was taken suddenly you also want answers as to why it had to be that way - answers you may never get.

All of this is a natural, normal and important part of the healing process. I have been told by others who have experienced a tragic loss, that one day it will all feel different. You will still be sad for something very precious has been taken from your life, but it will not be the overwhelming, debilitating sadness that you may be experiencing right now. In time, and please bear in mind it is different for everyone, but in time you will be able to accept that this person is no longer in your life, but you will forever carry the love they gave you in your heart, and the memories of your loved ones will bring you joy not pain.

My counselor told me not to wait until I feel better to do more she said, "Do more and you will feel better." For some just getting out of bed may be a tall order so keep in mind It doesn't have to be anything monumental, just one small thing that keeps you moving forward. Part of my healing is to continue with the Kidsgoals website and newsletter. My goal is to have the next issue out before Valentines day. It gives me something to occupy my mind and I know it is something that my dear friend would have wanted.

Wishing you all love and support on your own healing journey,

Monicka

Compromises in Friendship

Tuesday is usually Cassie's day to blog but I am hoping that she will cover for me on Wednesday as I will be leaving for the UK and may not have time to write one. That is what is so great about our friendship, it is very balanced where one person is not always doing the giving. That is something that children also need to learn about friendship and sometimes it may take a little reminder from you.

My daughter has learned the hard way that sometimes you need to bend a bit when it comes to her friends. She now knows that she may have to go along with what they want to do sometimes, even if it is not always her cup of tea. For instance when her friend invited her to go to a movie and they were trying to figure out which one to go to,she started to get upset when her friend wanted to see something she was not interested in. I had to stop her and take her aside and explain to her that friendship is about sometimes doing things with our friends that we may not really like. By agreeing to go to the movie that your friend wants to go to this time you can make a compromise and next time you can choose the movie. She agreed to go along with my suggestion and had a nice time and the next time she was able to choose the movie that they went to.

For more ideas on How to Help Your Child Make Friends

Monicka

Monday morning chatter and UK update

Well, it is Monday and time for another UK ticker update. But first a bit about the importance of friendship and children. Since I have a sixteen year old daughter who is Aspergian I know first hand how difficult making friends can be for some children. Social skills do not come naturally to her and so she has trouble making friends. My eleven year old son on the other hand seems to have no trouble making friends and so this is sometimes very difficult for my daughter. My son will be invited to sleep overs and birthday parties, while she spends a lot of her time alone. I know she has acquaintances at school and with a little push from her they could probably develop into friendships, but because of her inability to know how to befriend someone this does not happen. I know she is very likeable and she has a good heart and anytime we are in town and someone recognizes her they always say hi to her and ask her how she is doing.

This got me thinking about the fact that if I could sit in her pocket and observe her for the day, I would probably see signs from other people that they are willing to be her friend and spend time with her, but she either does not pick up on the subtle cues or if she feels a bit anxious may do something to give the impression that she is not interested when that could be the furthest thing from the truth.

My daughter has worked very hard with a speech language pathologist since she was quite young to learn social skills and how to make friends, but because of her Asperger's she still struggles in that department.

If you notice that your child seems to be a loner and has trouble making friends it may be a good idea to talk to a professional about what you can do as a parent to help him in that area. Not all kids are born with these skills and sometimes a little help may be needed.

Now for the weekly up date.

Well I tried to update my ticker but the website is down for a bit but according to my calculations I will be leaving for the UK in get this 9 Days woo hoo!!!
For ideas on How to Help Your Child Make Friends!


Happy Friendships,

Monicka